Blog /Youth

By Guest Blogger: Erica Thompson, TAYi

Pablo Picasso once said, "Painting is just another way of keeping a diary." On April 14, 2012 members of the Transition Age Youth Commission gathered together for the first Art of View Project. This project was led by Pedro Alvarez. Members were given white canvases and brushes and were asked to paint what was on their minds. The juices within our brains were flowing with originality. I painted a black silhouette of a dancer twirling behind a pink wash, since I always wanted to be a ballerina as a child. The ballerina is black and has dreadlocks. I wanted her to be black on purpose since there are so few black ballerinas.

Because my mother lacked the funds I never got to pursue ballet. Yet that didn't stop me. After my first psychotic break when I turned 17, I decided I wanted to do something for myself. I looked intensively for adult ballet classes and found one at the Berkeley Ballet Theatre in Berkeley, California. To this day, I am still dancing, except this time to another genre — Zumba, a Latin-dance inspired fitness program. 

I also painted a drawing of a young girl with an afro saying "Black is beautiful." I feel like we live in a society today where being black is not sought as beautiful in comparison with other races, when in fact black women are some of the most beautiful women. We come in all shades and colors, and our hair comes in all different textures. Being biracial, it was definitely difficult identifying with being both black and Chinese. At 5 when I was living in Oakland, I thought being black was the coolest thing to be. When I moved to Fremont, a predominately Asian and white suburb, I seemed to think otherwise. The one quote I do strive to live by is one by Marianne Williamson, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be?" Williamson's quote essentially means we all are afraid of something within us, even our past mistakes., but we need to embrace the power that still drives us to be the best we can possibly be.

One of the fantastic aspects to working at PEERS is our values.  Although PEERS is not an age-concentrated organization, we have a fabulous transition age youth program called TAYi (Transition Age Youth Initiative). TAYi serves youth at risk for involvement in the mental-health care, foster care and juvenile-justice systems.  In honor of our values, we have asked the youth in our program to blog about their experiences or what keeps them well.  Thank you for taking the time to read our youths' posts!  
--Letty Elenes
TAYi Coordinator/WRAP Lead
 

Cristina Cross
Holding down a job, internship, apartment, etc. while going to school and dealing with everyday life can be very stressful at times. To help stay above it all and keep from feeling overwhelmed, I like to have some “me time.” My “me time” consists of things that allow me to relax and refresh from everyday stress of going from one responsibility to another. My favorite “me time” activities include: sleeping in on Sunday mornings, getting away on little trips (even if its just to a nearby friend's house that I haven’t seen in a while) and good ol’ retail therapy (if my pockets are up to it). A few more things I enjoy doing include: journaling, working out, eating chocolate, going to places with a nice view, getting a change of scenery and nature walks (I know, it sounds cheesy but it is actually pretty awesome.) There is also great pleasure in doing absolutely nothing but lying around. Balance is the name of the game!

Having time to myself for these activities relaxes me because they are done out of pure recreation. There are no grades or performance evaluation I have to worry about.  No deadlines, set rules or boundaries to follow. I am free to do as I please! Taking out some time for myself keeps me from feeling overwhelmed. It also gives me something to look forward to. Speaking of anticipation, I can’t wait until this weekend where I will be utilizing some “me time” by going on a mini road trip to visit friends and family in LA. I am so excited to switch up my scene and be around loved ones I haven’t seen in a while. I haven’t even left yet and I’m already starting to feel a sense of joy and relief. I don’t get to have "me time" as often as I’d like to.  When I do, I am reminded of how a little bit of space and self- care can help refresh my spirits.

Rocio Elenes
I never thought this day would come, the day I go and choose my prom dress. Since I was a little girl, I've always wanted to dress up like a princess.  I didn’t have a Quinceañera so prom was my only chance. I looked online excessively before even going to the mall.  I was so excited to find the dress I wanted. So, I was at the mall with my friend and I see a prom dress store. I walked in and picked out a lot of dresses. I was having problems with the zipper on the first dress. I peeked outside the dressing room for help. I saw all of the other girls with their moms helping them out. I wanted to call out to my friend, but she was on the other side of the store. I tried on the next dress and ran into the same problem. I just needed help. I finally got into one by myself and went outside the dressing room to the mirrors and I loved it. There was just no one else there to love it with me. All of the other girls had their moms with them to tell them they looked wonderful.  The woman who worked at the store told me I looked great just to convince me to buy the dress. That day made me sad. My mom passed away years ago. I didn’t have anyone to tell me how breathtaking I looked. I didn’t want to even go to prom anymore. I started thinking of other excuses of why I shouldn’t go: it was too expensive, I didn’t have a limo, or prom was on a Friday.  Then one random day, my sister said that she wanted to buy me the dress. So I made plans with my sister to go to San Francisco the next day to find one. My sister, my niece, and my cousin all went with me and I was excited again. The first dress I tried on was the perfect one and all of them thought so too. That’s when I realized that my mom was there. She was my sister! My whole family has raised me.  They are who keep me well. They make me feel better even when they don’t even know that something is wrong.

Erica Thompson

Black Jesus
By Erica Thompson
Inspired by the film "Red Tails"

Black Jesus

Wherefore thou Black Jesus

I am hidden in darkness

Ashes

negro the spanish word for black

derogatory derivatives

Why do you call me a Ni---r?

Don't you know its offensive

I am black and beautiful

I fly fighter airplanes

I survive the Germans

Schwartz the German word for black

I am not an Afrikaner

I am a human being

Thank you for taking the time to read our youths' posts! We welcome comments :)

One of the fantastic aspects to working at PEERS is our values. Although PEERS is not an age-concentrated organization, we have a fabulous transition age youth program called TAYi (Transition Age Youth Initiative). TAYi serves youth at risk for involvement in the mental-health care, foster care and juvenile-justice systems. In honor of our values, we have asked the youth in our program to blog about their experiences or what keeps them well. Thank you for taking the time to read our youths' posts!
--Letty Elenes
TAYi Coordinator/WRAP Lead

Pedro Alvarez          
As soon as I arrived to my first TAYi meeting, I felt welcomed and like I belonged. That was huge to me because prior to joining TAYi, I was getting in trouble in the streets with painting, stealing, etc. Basically I was up to no good, which caused my parents to yell and be mad at me. At the time, I hated them for not understanding my lifestyle. Now looking back years later, I understand what they were going through. If it weren't for TAYi, I would still be in what I like to call the “Dead End Lifestyle”. They kept me busy and made me feel important. They gave me jobs and opportunities to make money while doing what I love. One job that really stood out for me was making a mental wellness game board with my fellow youth that reflected my community. My job was to design and draw the game board on a huge canvas. They let me do whatever I want with it so I had a lot of fun.  Months later after the completion, PEERS invited me to present the game in Orland, Florida at the national consumer conference Alternatives! It was an amazing experience. I’m really grateful I found out about the TAYi. I can honestly say if it weren't for it, my life wouldn’t be the same.
 

Angel Cortes
My experience with PEERS and the TAYi has been not only a rewarding experience, but a very fun experience. I have been given the opportunity to express myself and not feel judged or ashamed of whom I am. I’ve been given the opportunity to speak out about everyday TAY problems and ways that we want to change things within the system. As I continue to participate and share my story with peers, providers and consumers, I feel that speaking out has given me an insight as to who I am. And I will continue to advocate for TAY and anybody with mental health issues. I enjoy working with the TAYi and PEERS because the presentations we give have always been from the heart. The trainings we attend are very educational and interesting. I hope to inspire consumers and providers with not only our actions, but also our words. If I had not joined TAYi, I might not been so informed about mental health and events affecting the communities. I never thought I would enjoy working in such a field because I didn’t feel like I would be able to do my part. As I continue work in this field, my ultimate goal is to inform and change the system to something that doesn’t discriminate against mental health consumers.
 

Kimberly Marquez
My experience doing WRAP and recently becoming a WRAP facilitator wasn’t as simple as I had imagined. The whole process was tedious, long, tiring, stressful and irritating. But in the end, it is one of my greatest accomplishments to date. I recall filling out the application and thinking to myself, "This is going to be easy. I already know this and I got this in the bag." Needless to say, that was ridiculous thinking on my part to be so cocky. During the three-day training, I quickly found out that I had to make sure I was well and that my plan was working for me before I could even think about facilitating. After completing the three-day training, I once again said, " Oh five days of this is going to be easy. I’m well; my plan is good so how hard can it be? I’ll just do exactly what the facilitators did and not break a sweat." Well, once again that was one of the most stupid things I could have thought. On day one of the five-day training, I realized this was no joke. If I intended on completing the five-day training and starting my own WRAP group I better know how many sections there are, what are a trigger and wellness tools. So there I was again stuck in my head, thinking I knew it all and realizing I wasn’t even close. After having completed a total of eight full-day trainings and 25 mentoring hour, I wasn’t prepared for the butt kicking I got. I didn’t know that it would be so much work, that I would learn so much and that I would use all of that information in my day- to- day life. Having gone through all that work made me cherish my certificate because I worked hard to get it. Being one of the youngest facilitators certified made me prouder. All I have to say now is I did it !!!

Thank you for taking the time to read our youths' posts! We welcome comments :)